Until the Break of Dawn – Staying Connected While Conflicted
Friday, December 5, 2025 – ט״ו כִּסְלֵו תשפ”ו
וַיֹּ֣אמֶר שַׁלְּחֵ֔נִי כִּ֥י עָלָ֖ה הַשָּׁ֑חַר וַיֹּ֙אמֶר֙ לֹ֣א אֲשַֽׁלֵּחֲךָ֔ כִּ֖י אִם־בֵּרַכְתָּֽנִי׃ (בראשית לב:כז)
“Then he said, ‘Let me go, for dawn is breaking.’ But he answered, ‘I will not let you go, unless you bless me.'” (Genesis 32:27)
We find Jacob, alone at night on the banks of the Jabbok River, physically wrestling with a mysterious being until dawn. It is a scene of exhaustion, fear, tenacity, and ultimately of transformation. By sunrise, Jacob emerges forever changed. He carries a new name — Yisrael, “the one who wrestles with God” — and a limp that will accompany him for the rest of his life.
This is the story our tradition chooses as the origin of our collective identity. Not an act of triumph, not a moment of clarity, but a struggle. Our peoplehood is rooted in ambiguity, pain, perseverance, and the refusal to disengage even when disengagement would be easier. To be Jewish is not to submit, nor is it always to resist, but to wrestle.
As I look at the current reality of Israel and the Jewish world, I am reminded constantly that Jacob’s night is our night as well. The struggle is not an anomaly in Jewish life — it is the norm. The Zionist Movement was founded to end our struggles. To exist as a “normal” people, free, in our own Land, and to be welcomed into the community of nations like every other nation-state. Yet, we are still struggling today – struggling for identity, to bridge the widening gaps in our own society, and to come to terms with the current reality – which may be a brazen divergence from what Jacob hoped for or wished would be.
Israel today is entering yet another season of deep crisis. Prime Minister Netanyahu’s request for a pardon in his corruption trial has reopened wounds around the rule of law and integrity in leadership. Meanwhile, the contentious fight over the conscription of ultra-Orthodox men is pushing Israeli society toward a crossroads: What does shared responsibility look like in a Jewish and democratic state? Who carries the burden of defense, and who defines the terms of communal obligation?
Layer onto this the still-searing pain of October 7, the ongoing trauma for Israelis and Palestinians, the polarization in public discourse, and the reality of Jewish communities abroad navigating rising antisemitism alongside growing discomfort — and sometimes moral outrage — about the actions of the Israeli government and the often-double standards applied to the Jewish State.
It feels as though the entire Jewish world is wrestling in the dark.
The Voice of the “Conflictedly Connected”
In a recent essay in Haaretz, author and journalist Joshua Leifer describes a broad but often invisible segment of American Jewry as “the conflictedly connected.” These are Jews who love Israel deeply, who understand its existential necessity, who feel bound to its people and its fate — yet who are also troubled, heartbroken, and at times furious about its policies and political direction.
I recognize these Jews. I often identify as one of them.
They/we are not ambivalent; they/we are engaged. They are not indifferent; they are morally awake. They are not anti-Zionist; they are struggling Zionists — the very inheritors of Jacob, wrestling because the relationship matters too much to walk away.
And yet, the public space has shrunk. Too often, the loudest voices are either ultra-hawkish defenders of every government action or anti-Zionist voices who reject the very premise of Jewish peoplehood and/or Jewish self-determination, and are seemingly deeply uncomfortable with the basic premise of Jewish power. The middle — the struggling, wrestling, morally engaged middle — is drowned out.
As Reform Jews and Reform Zionists, our message to this group is clear: Speak up. Do not retreat. Do not cede the conversation to the extremes.
What Jacob teaches us is that the struggle itself is generative and a model for our communal theology. Our tradition does not worship certainty; it sanctifies engagement. The limp Jacob carries is not a sign of defeat but of endurance. His wound is the price of the relationship, and according to commentators, was always there, but was just noticed once the sun came up.
The rabbis notice something stunning: Jacob names the place פְּנִיאֵ֑ל (P’niel), “for I have seen God face to face,” (32:31) even though the encounter was painful, even though he did not get all the answers, even though blessing came with bruises. Holiness emerges not from escaping conflict but from staying in it.
And that may be our task today.
To love Israel enough to struggle with it.
To love our people enough to challenge them/ourselves.
To love Jewish life enough to risk being uncomfortable.
To love justice enough to demand that Jewish power be exercised responsibly, ethically, and compassionately.
It is tempting, in moments like this, to withdraw — to step back from Israel conversations, or from our communities, or from our own Zionist commitments. But disengagement is not a Jewish response. It is not a Reform response. It is not a Zionist response.
Reform Judaism holds that wrestling is sacred. We are a movement that believes in critical loyalty, in prophetic Zionism, in the marriage of peoplehood and conscience. Our theology reminds us that our covenant is not canceled by disagreement. Our history reminds us that Jewish destiny is shared whether we like it or not.
To stay connected while conflicted is not a compromise; it is a calling.
So, what does it mean, practically, to take up Jacob’s task today?
- Refuse to abandon the conversation.
We must model a Judaism that is unafraid of complexity. We must create spaces where grief, anger, hope, and solidarity can coexist. - Hold leaders accountable without surrendering our stake in the Jewish future.
Calling out injustice or corruption is not anti-Israel; it is profoundly Jewish. Enforcing the rule of law, a balance of power, and that each person, whether Prime Minister or Yeshiva student, is equal in the face of the law and is equally bound by it. - Invest in Israeli partners who share our values.
The Reform Movement in Israel needs us — not as cheerleaders but as allies in the struggle for democracy, equality, and a Judaism of compassion. As we wrestle and struggle, we must do it with our partners on the ground. Now is the time to explore further partnerships between our communities and Kehilot. - Continue Showing Up.
We can help our teens, congregants, and families understand that disagreement does not require disengagement. Now is the time to invest in immersive experiences and to make sure that every student in our movement engages in meaningful, significant, life-changing, and fun(!) educational experiences in Israel. Sign up now for Yallah! Israel and for URJ Heller High Semester in Israel. - Jacob’s Example:
Stay in the fight until dawn. Demand blessing even in the dark. Walk forward even with a limp.
On the surface, it appears as though Jacob’s struggle ends with sunrise. The struggle produces clarity, blessing, and a renewed sense of purpose. We are not there yet — not as a people, not as Israel, not as a movement. But the promise of dawn is baked into our story.
To be Jewish is to believe that the dawn will come.
To be Jewish is to wrestle our way toward it.
May we, the “conflictedly connected”, the “Troubled and committed,” and the ones who are courageous enough to stay in the struggle, to love fiercely, critique honestly, connect deeply, and walk forward, wounded but blessed, toward a better future for Israel and for all our people.
Shabbat Shalom.